Lust, Adultery and Divorce

Scripture
Matthew 5:27-37
[27] “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ [28] But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. [29] If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell. [30] And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell.
[31] “It was also said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ [32] But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
[33] “Again you have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not swear falsely, but shall perform to the Lord what you have sworn.’ [34] But I say to you, Do not take an oath at all, either by heaven, for it is the throne of God, [35] or by the earth, for it is his footstool, or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the great King. [36] And do not take an oath by your head, for you cannot make one hair white or black. [37] Let what you say be simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything more than this comes from evil.
Engaging the Scripture
1. Adultery was another significant issue that was prohibited in the Ten Commandments (Ex.20:14) and other biblical passages. What is “adultery”?
2. Jesus never diminished the importance of avoiding inappropriate sexual physical contact, but He clearly extended this to one’s thoughts and motives. What does it mean to “look at woman with lustful intent” (vs.28)? Is this different than noticing or even finding someone else to be physically attractive?
3. Lust may indeed lead a person to further act out upon his/her desires (see James 1:14-15), but Jesus’ indicates that lust is a sin in and of itself. Why do you think that this is considered sinful behavior?
4. Jesus’ words recorded in Matthew 5:29–30 have often been misunderstood. Obviously Jesus was not teaching physical mutilation, for a blind man could have as much of a problem with lust as a sighted person, and a man with only one hand might use it also to sin. Jesus was advocating the removal of the inward cause of offense. Since a lustful heart would ultimately lead to adultery, one’s heart must be changed. Only by such a change of heart can one escape hell (“Gehenna”; cf. v. 22).
Why do you think that Jesus would use such a strong figure of speech to make His point?
5. When Jesus said “It was also said”, He was referencing Moses’ teaching on divorce found in Deuteronomy 24:1-4. What does this passage mean? Why was it necessary?
6. Compare Matthew 5:31-32 with Matthew 19:1-12. What additional information does this passage provide regarding God’s view of divorce?
7. How does the action of divorcing one’s spouse cause the divorced party to commit adultery and the one marrying a divorced woman (or man) to “commit adultery”?
8. While there are undeniably differing views on divorce among Christians, what is Jesus’ main point regarding marriage?
Living as a Kingdom Citizen
1. How should Jesus’ teaching on divorce influence those who are married?
How should Jesus’ teaching on divorce influence future decisions of those who are presently divorced and single?
How should Jesus’ teaching on divorce influence those who are presently unmarried but would like to be married in the future?
2. What was the basic problem that Jesus was seeking to address in this teaching on oaths? (vs.34-36)
3. What was His solution to the deceptive, hypocritical practices of his day regarding oaths? (vs.37)
4. What are some ways that people mislead and deceive by professions of truthfulness in our culture?
5. Are there any areas of your life in which you are being deceptive while professing to be truthful? What can you do to correct this?
6. One psychologist with extensive training and experience helping men and women with sexual addiction and misconduct has stated “Although fantasizing is not always an addiction, the goal is the same: to create false intimacy and avoid relational pain.”
How is “false intimacy” destructive to relationships?
How else is pornography destructive to people?
7. In a different context, the Apostle Paul speaks of how to battle fleshly impulses when he writes “For though we walk in the flesh, we are not waging war according to the flesh. For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh but have divine power to destroy strongholds. We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ … (2 Cor. 10:3-5).
How do these words apply to the issue of lustful thoughts?
Paul instructed Timothy to “flee youthful passions and to pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart” (2 Tim.2:22).
Why is it important to both “flee” lustful passions and to “pursue” personal purity?
What other thoughts or actions can be helpful to maintaining sexual purity?